The Best and Worst of Salsa        The Full List        Other Comments of Note
 

The Best and Worst of Salsa

Remember, kids, the lower the ranking the better the Chevys, and the number in parenthesis is the number of people who have ranked it.

The Best Chevys The Worst Chevys
1. Richmond     1.25    (4)
  • "As it should be, brown!" - Lila
  • "Brown! The best! What salsa should be!" - Kathy
 1. Newark     4.8     (5)
  • "Greenish, runny, bland... where are we? El Torito?" - Kathy
  • "Bitter brown-green sewage. They dare call this Chevys salsa?" - Brendan
2. Greenbelt, Maryland     1.5     (2)
  • "Mmmm... kick ass" - Mark
  • "Damn good though not brown" - Kathy
 2. Fairfield     4.5     (2)
  • "The infamous `jizz salsa.' Not Newark but close." - Kathy
  • "Weird. Not horrible, but not right." - Brendan
3. (tie) Alameda     1.75     (4)
  • "THE BEST SALSA I'VE EVER HAD. (EASILY DEFEATS RICHMOND) - Brendan
  • "Bowls overflowing with salsa. Life is good." - Kathy
  • "Had a big weed in it" - Mark
 3. Vallejo     4.4     (5)
  • "All chunks and liquid, need a smoother blend" - Brendan
3. (tie) Redwood City     1.75     (4)
  • "So brown it was almost black" - Brendan
  • "Really good but brown city" - Mark
 4. Stan Francisco - Stonestown     4.25     (4)
  • "Rivalling Newark - not good" - Kathy
  • "If you can't make good salsa, don't open a Chevys" - Brendan
3. (tie) Stan Ramon     1.75     (4)
  • "Good flavor; pretty brown" - Lila
  • "Strangely different, but strangely different in a good way"  - Brendan
 5. Stan Francisco - Embarcadero     4.125     (8)
  • "Like Mom used to make only worse" - Sean
  • "Yuck - half a notch above chunky ketchup" - Mark
  • "Silly Mildred, twigs are for kids" - Bryan
3. (tie) Santa Rosa     1.75     (2)
  • "Pretty good - no evil spicy bits" - Mark
  • "Tasted brown though it was red" - Kathy

The Full List


1. Richmond  1.25  (4)
2. Greenbelt, Maryland  1.5  (2)
3. (tie) Alameda  1.75  (4)
3. (tie) Redwood City  1.75  (4)
3. (tie) Stan Ramon 1.75  (4)
3. (tie) Santa Rosa  1.75  (2)
7. (tie) Laguna Niguel  2.0  (2)
7. (tie) San Diego - Mission Valley  2.0  (3)
      Union City  2.0  (1)
9. (tie) Annapolis, Maryland 2.25 (2)
9. (tie) Encino 2.25 (4)
11. (tie) La Mesa  2.5  (2)
11. (tie) Ontario  2.5  (4)
11. (tie) Pleasanton  2.5  (4)
11. (tie) Stan Francisco - Stonestown  2.5  (4)
11. (tie) Stan Leandro  2.5  (4)
11. (tie) Stan Jose - Almaden  2.5  (4)
      Arlington, Virginia 2.5 (1)
        Warwick, Rhode Island Chili's 2.5 (2)
16. Stunnyvale  2.67  (3)
17. Greenbrae  2.875  (4)
18. (tie) Burbank  3.0  (2)
18. (tie) Folsom  3.0  (2)
18. (tie) Gold River  3.0  (2)
18. (tie) Mountain View  3.0  (5)
18. (tie) Sacramento - Garden Highway  3.0  (2)
18. (tie) San Diego - Carmel Mountain  3.0  (3) 
18. (tie) Saugus, Massachusetts 3.0 (4)
18. (tie) South Lake Tahoe  3.0  (2)
      Sacramento - Howe  3.0  (1)
        Stan Francisco - Van Ness  3.0  (1)
26. Warwick, Rhode Island 3.25 (2)
27. Sacramento - South Sacramento  3.5  (2)
        Khayyam's  3.5 (4)
        Magic Garlic 3.5 (5)
28. Irvine  3.67  (3)
29. (tie) El Cerrito  3.75  (4)
29. (tie) Gilroy  3.75  (4)
29. (tie) Pleasant Hill  3.75  (4)
32. (tie) Dixon  4.0  (2)
32. (tie) Roseville   4.0  (2)
     Auburn  4.0  (1)
       Kathy & Mark's Apartment   4.0  (1)
       Kathy's Anus  4.0  (3)
34. Stan Francisco - Embarcadero  4.125  (8)
35. Stan Francisco - Stonestown  4.25  (4)
36. Vallejo  4.4  (5)
37. Fairfield  4.5  (2)
38. Newark 4.8  (5)

Other comments of note

Dixon: "Anything would taste bad on those `chips.' - Brendan
Encino: "Something different about this salsa and I'm not sure I like it" - Brendan
Gilroy: "Watch out Newark, here comes Gilroy" - Mark
Greenbrae: "First batch had `tomato mountain,' second batch pretty good" - Lila
Kathy & Mark's Apartment: "Safeway Select not nearly as bad as it sounds" - Brendan
Kathy's Anus: "Brown does NOT mean good" - Brendan
                        "Brown, smelly. Jizz?" - Lila
                        "Brown and spicy... but runny" - Mark
Khayyam's: "Yummus" - Brendan
Magic Garlic: "BLAGH! What the *@#?! Is this pure garlic?!" - Brendan
                        "Whoa Nellie! This here ain't Chevys salsa. This stuff's made in New York City! New York City?!" - Kathy
Mountain View: "After Newark, even average tastes great" - Brendan
                            "The salsa was spicy, but only refilled twice-y" - Bryan
Ontario: "Suspiciously similar to Encino" - Lila
Pleasanton: "Looked like ketchup but tasted pretty good" - Mark
Sacramento - South Sacramento: "Chunkiest salsa ever; broccoli sighted" - Kathy
Stunnyvale: "I've eaten better ass than this" - Kathy
Warwick, Rhode Island: "It was good until Mark said it tasted like pizza sauce. Then it tasted like pizza sauce." - Kathy

 
 

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