Okay, so here's another Bay Area based melodocore band, No Use for a Name. I have some pictures I took at a show, and also some audio samples for you to listen. The audio samples are in RealAudio format, for that slim emaciated look.

No Use for a Name are:

• Tony Sly, guitar and vocals
• Steve Papoutis, bass
• Jake Jackson, lead guitar
• Rory Koff, drums

As you may notice, Jake attempted reconstructive surgery on Ed Gregor's photo so as to resemble Jake more. Ed Gregor was the previous lead guitarist, but he left the band prior to their tour on account of his diabetes. I don't know how the story goes, whether they made him leave, or whether he really had to leave on account of his condition. But regardless, they didn't have much time to find a replacement lead guitarist, as no one could really reproduce Ed's awesome solos -- the people they've auditioned did their own "interpretations." So basically just before they started touring, they became more desperate than a kid performing the pee dance as the hundredth in line at Disneyland. On a most serendipitous quirk of fate, they found Jake the loser working at Fat Wreck Chords, who just happened to know the solos of seventeen of NUfaN's songs (and counting). The fidelity of Ed's solos was restored, and so they're hanging in there.

[Show review on July 30, 1995)

Whew!  Yesterday's No Use for a Name show at the Berkeley Square was awesome!

	Okay, so after posting on the internet to elicit total strangers to go 
with me to the show -- as I have no friends, and really, no life -- some Cal 
student (Brian) wanted to go.  I am such a loser, and I guess he felt sorry for 
me.  Anyway, yesterday night was the night of all freebies!  Brian works at 
Clark Kerr as a conference clerk, so he was able to schmooze off his taxicab 
connections and get us a free ride down to Berkeley Square.  So we got down 
to BS, and decided to stave off hunger pangs with some corporate Taco Bell food 
products (see, Bo, at Taco Bell, things can get interesting).  Which was a 
really cool turn of fate, because who else happened to eat realistic cheese 
than Tony Sly, vocals and guitar of No Use for a Name, and Jake Jackson, New 
lead-guitarist-Kid on the Block (more on him later).  I wasn't sure at first if 
it was Tony in real life.  So I whipped out my Leche con Carne album -- yes, I 
am an idiot fanboy -- and compared the mugshots.  Yes!  After being mauled by 
the star-struck truck, I managed to approach him and ask in my mopey-loser 
voice, "Are you Tony Sly of NUfaN?"  Well, after a yes and my shoving my inlay 
in his face for an autograph to quell my insecurities as to have to prove to 
meet someone moderately famous, I asked him how long the band has been around (since 
'87), how they formed (at some parents' party), and what, if any, are the 
possibilities of piano punk key-core ever becoming a respectable subgenre 
(yeah! go for it!).  I also got an autograph from Jake Jackson, but since his 
photo wasn't in the cover, I told him he could just sign in Ed's place (ouch!),
and he drew a self-portrait over Ed's face (a happy face).  More on this later.
	Okay, so Brian and I were waiting in line, I being especially wary of 
the muscle-bound frat boy security jock that BS hired, wondering, "Am I in the 
right line?  I don't really have tickets.  But I'm not exactly on the guest 
list either."  Not that it matters.  It's kinda like the mail slots in the post 
office.  You know, a slot for stamped mail, metered mail, air mail, packaged 
mail, but when you look behind the partition, all the shit goes in the same bin
anyway.  Same with the entrance.  So I said to the cashier, "I won a pair of 
tickets."  And bam! score another freebie!
	After allowing my homeopathic systems to acclimate to second hand smoke 
and pot, I looked, and wait -- what's this?, yes! why that's Rory the drummer! 

 Whipping out my inlay and shoving it in his face, I fired a volley of 
questions, such as, "Did you guys take lessons?  (Well, I took some drum 
lessons.  The other guys just picked it up.)  Why No Use for a Name?  (Couldn't 
think of a name.)  Did you have to get copyright permission for that *very 
last* song?  (Well, hopefully people realize it as a joke, er, a tribute.)  And 
- ahem - did you guys really kick out Ed?"
	Was it Dave or Naes who was pissed off at NUfaN?  Oh, wait, it was Naes 
-- sorry Dave.  Well, Naes was real mad at NUfaN, supposedly because Ed, a 
friend of his, was kicked out of the band on account of having diabetes.  I 
don't know, they said he quit on his own, because he got too sick from shooting 
up so much insulin.  And this was two days before their first show to kick off 
the tour, so it did seem a bit absurd that they wouldn't want him to continue 
unless he really wasn't up to it.  So for two days, they had to crash audition 
anyone who could play the lead as well as Ed.  Many guitarists tried, but each 
one had their own little "re-interpretation" of the original leads.  So nearly 
giving up hope, they finally found some punk-kid-Corey-Haim-look-alike working 
at Fat Wreck Chords, Jake, who memorized all the leads verbatim of 19 of their 
songs.  They took him.  Well, so I don't know whom to believe.  I guess I'll 
just leave it at that and listen to Shades of Grey by Billy Joel.

	Concerning Eye started the show.  They were okay.  Um, the singer doesn't 
sing.  He screams.  And I couldn't hear him anyway because the guitars were too 
loud.  They were decent in technical ability, but the songs didn't stick out at 
all.  I guess it was because they didn't have any real melodies (and my 
personal liking is melodo-punk and good singing).  I suppose having real 
melodies is kinda hard to do because there wasn't any lead guitars or at least 
a lead bass ala You Know Who, so it was just your basic chords, with basic 
arpeggiation and no syncopation.  Wait, Brian, punk music isn't really this 
bad.  You have to wait a while.  At least the frat boys didn't know any better, 
as any insightful lyrics drowned out by the guitarists would have fallen on 
deaf ears anyway, since they were too busy slamming into everyone in the mosh 
pit to test out their newly steroid-laden muscles.
	Mr. T Experience was next, and they were awesome!  I suppose their 
obscurity may lie in their undistinguished band name, but they are not to be 
missed!  It is quite an enigma how they aren't as popularized as Green Day, 
considering how the style is almost similar.  Hmm, it must be Billie Joe's good 
looks that won him over to MTV's teeny boppers.  Anyway, one of Mr. T 
Experience's songs, "This Shitty Little Band," describes just this situation. 
They are a riot, with catchy songs, ultra-extra-cheese lyrics, and opening 
almost every number with, "This next song...is about a girl."  Good melodies, 
kinda remind me of the baseline of Sesame Street songs when one learns about 
the numbers and the alphabet.
	With the situation they're in, I didn't think NUfaN could pull off a 
decent show on such short notice in getting a lead guitar substitute.  But Jake 
mirrored *everything* perfectly, especially the ending of "Fields of Agony."  
They were very technically tight in Soulmate (although either my ears were 
going deafer, or Tony sang a little off-key).  Everything was basically CD 
recording studio perfect, but in Marley's Redemption Song cover, they added a 
little reggae-ska intro that wasn't in the album.  Overall, a great 
performance, although I was a little disappointed that they didn't perform 
"Justified Black Eye."  After hunting down my fourth and final victim, Steve, 
to complete my autographical specimen collection (God, you'd think they put the 
partitioned mugshots in the inlays just for this purpose!), I found out that 
they haven't gotten it all down yet with Jake on that number.
	The show was definitely worthy of my own utter lack of productivity. 
 Well, having no social life, I could have stayed addicted to the internet for 
the day, but this was a good patch of nicotine for me.  And yes! score another 
freebie -- Brian called for another free taxicab ride back to Clark Kerr.  BTW, 
Brian gave to some homeless person a dollar bill a kid gave him at the show for 
holding his place, but not before he burned the corners with a lighter,  See, 
money is really recylcable.  And then at Clark Kerr, since Brian was the 
conference clerk there, he let me stay in one of the suite arrangements, where 
-- score freebie! -- I got little bottles of shampoo and soap -- cool!

						--Caephus

P.S. If you got this far on this self-indulging egotistical post of a slice of 
my puny life, then I should reward you.  This September 3, at Pier 32, there 
will be *fourteen* bands performing in a punkfest, including some biggies like 
NOFX.  And of course, NUfaN will be there.

[Editor's note: The show, called the Warped Tour, was rescheduled at the Concord
Pavilion.  Ah, Concord, home of the inbreeds, where everyone is somehow
your father's uncle's daughter's brother's cousin.]