An idea is born

Several months ago, the word came out that Disneyland was going to rehab Pirates of the Caribbean for the ride's 30th anniversary. (They're upgrading the computer conrolling system). Rumors persisted that Pirates was also going to be made more "PC" by altering the scene where the male pirates chase after the women. These rumors were later substantiated. So, I decided to ride Pirates onece more before it was altered. I told my friends in LA--Tim Castro, Dori & Larry Hoffman, and Cindy Yan of my plans, and they too were intersted. I planned to drive to LA, spend a few days there, and then drive back. We figured that Sunday the 5th would be the best day to visit. It was going to be the final day for the unaltered Pirates, the final day before the Carnation Ice Cream restaurant underwent major renovations (though its final day was moved up to Friday the 3rd) the final day of the season for the Christmas Parade, and the final day *ever* for The Rocket Jets.

Should I Stay or Should I Go

Unfortunately, my car started acting up, and I was getting bogged down in work, and I was unsure about a few things, and I *had* been to Disneyland in October. So, a little bit after Christmas, I announced l was cancelling my trip. Fortunately for me, Cindy got me to change my mind (and also offered me rides and a place to stay), and Southwest Airlines made it very easy for me to cash in my frequent flyer reward tickets. I also e-mailed Tim, told him of my last minute reversal, and made arrangements so we could meet at Disneyland.

Saturday the 4th went by quickly...and soon (after about a 50 minute dalay) I was flying to Ontario. Cindy was waiting for me at the gate when I deplaned. I was kind of surprised that when after you walk down the air stairs, you walk through an actual gate that divides the tarmaac from the "greeting area" and that the greeting area was essentially a covered sidewalk. I commented to Cindy that the last time I had been in such a rinky-dink airport was in the Philippines.

Enlough of airports; My flight was supposed to arrive in time for dinner, so neither of us had eaten. I didn't have anything in mind, so Cindy suggested Chili's.

What color is that?

Dinner was an interesting experience, and not just for us. After we waited for about ten minutes, we were called. At the front desk of a Chili's, you'll find crayons; Cindy grabbed one, so I, being like a monkey, grabbed one too. My crayon was a shade of green called simply enough "green" while Cindy's was a shade of orange called "macaroni and cheese" (which is why she grabbed it in the first place...she later told me that she was "so amazed at that 'color' crayon that I had to get one as proof of its existence and to justify my outrage that they were making up color names.").

Cindy tried to get a better idea what exact color it looked like (other than a shade of orange) but the lighting was poor. I had brought my backpack with me, so I pulled out my flashlight and used it to confirm that the crayon did have that orange cheese sauce color to it. Cindy asked "You carry a flashlight?" I said "Hey, it comes in handy." She then put her crayon away so she could show it to other friends.

Have you ever been asked that before?

Another downside of the change to the tables is that they no longer have stacks of coasters at each table. This was disappointment to Cindy, because she wanted to play cards with the coasters, even though, as she said, "You always get five of a kind". When our waiter finally arrived, she asked him "Don't you guys have coasters anymore?" He promised to bring us some, and took our orders.

When he came back, he brought us an unopened pack of coasters, which was a little more than we expected, but we didn't complain. We thanked our waiter, and Cindy also asked "So, have you ever been asked that before?" He laughed and said the hadn't.

How to amuse yourself while waiting for your meal

We only played one hand of poker, since we both had five of a kind. Next, Cindy started laying out coasters in a tiled pattern. She asked me if I could figure out what the pattern was. I had thought that the pattern involved which directions the chili pepper on the coaster was pointing. Nope...there were also lines on the coasters, and the pattern involved which direction the lines were going. After that, we started to build a house of cards...or coasters. We got as far as a one-story house. I tried a second story, but it would always collapse. My second attempt came real close, but then collapsed and caused a small part of the first story to collapse. Cindy tried to rebuild, but then the rest of the house collapsed. Fortunately at this point, our waiter returned with our dinner. We exchanged the coasters for our food (but we didn't play with our food).

Just to satisfy the calorie counters out there, I'll tell you that I had grilled swordfish, a vegetable skewer, and rice. Yes, it was delicious. (Are you happy La? :)

Think of some answers

We then drove back to Cindy's house. This was the first time I've been there, though she showed me pictures of it two years ago. She gave me the "grand tour" of her two-story, four-bedroom house. Throughout the tour, Cindy showed off various items she's collected (and I appreciated seeing them). When the tour ended, she pulled out a list of stupid questions she had been asked while she was a cast member at Disneyland. I couldn't help but read all of them and try to come up with answers. Some of these were easy..."Do you work here?...No, I just happened to dress like this today; How was I supposed to know that the people who work here where the same outfits?" or "How much is that machine?...Why? Did you want to buy it? It's not for sale." Actually, I got so wrapped up in this, that Cindy had to remind me to call Tim to change our meeting plans (Cindy had found a friend who was going to bring her daughter and her daughter's friend along--we were to meet them at 8am). Tim had no problem changing his plans from meeting outside the park to inside.

A Rainy Day at the Park

During the night, it ended up raining. I didn't notice until I woke up during what Commander Ivonova on Babylon 5 calls "The Hour of the Wolf"--the hour *before* you want to wake up. I looked out the window of the guest room and even though it was still dark, it was obvious that it had rained. Later, I turned on the TV to find out what the weather was supposed to be like--they said it was supposed to be partly cloudy. When Cindy came downstairs, she was wearing a Dallas Cowboys sweatshirt (the Cowboys and the Niners are her favorite NFL teams). I said "Ah, you're empathetically rooting for the Cowboys" (since the Cowboy game was that day). I, on the otherhand, chose to wear my Fantasmic sweatshirt.

We got to the park at about 8:15. Surprisingly, we got to park in aisle 1 of the Jiminy Cricket section; it was the closest either of us had parked to the main entrance. We waited for Cindy's friend outside.

When 8:30 rolled around, we heard the band play and the gates to main street open. Then Cindy and I went to purchase my passport. She had a Magic Kingdom Club card, so I was able to get my passport for two dollars off (As Al Lutz says, "Hey! it pays for the cost of a churro inside the park.") I went inside to meet up with Tim, while Cindy waited for her friend.

As I walked in, it started to rain. Normally I would be disapointed at this, but it wasn't heavy, and looked like it would go away quickly. Tim spotted me pretty quickly and told me a little bit about how the alt.disney.disneyland meeting for the final day of the current version of the Carnation restaurant was. In the mean time, Cindy found her friend, Amanda, who had brought two munchkins (actually they're adorable girls)--her daughter Savannah and Savannah's friend Re'nisha (or Nini, for short). We all met in time for the "Rope Drop".

The Object of Visiting the Park

We calmly walked to Pirates of the Caribbean--and there was not much of a line. Cindy asked the unloader what the inflight movie was; He thought for a few seconds and answered "The Pirates of Penzance" Not bad, it's better than "The Pirate Movie" or "Cutthroat Island". Anyway, As soon as we went down the falls, we started singing along... why not join in?

    Yo, ho, yo, ho, a pirates life for me.
    We pillage, we plunder, we rifle and loot.
    Drink up! me 'arties, yo ho.
    We kidnap and ravage and don't give a hoot, 
    Drink up! me 'arties, yo ho.

    Yo, ho, yo, ho, a pirates life for me.
    We extort, we pilfer, we filch and sack, 
    Drink up! me 'arties, yo ho!
    Maraud and embezzle and even hijack
    Drink up! me 'arties, yo ho.

    Yo, ho, yo, ho, a pirates life for me.
    We kindle and char, inflame and ignite, 
    Drink up! me 'arties, yo ho.
    We burn up the city; we're really a fright, 
    Drink up! me 'arties, yo ho.

    We're rascals, scoundrels, villians, and knaves.*
    Drink up! me 'arties, yo ho.
    We're devils and black sheep--really bad eggs
    Drink up! me 'arties, yo ho.

    Yo, ho, yo, ho, a pirates life for me.
    We're beggars and blighters and ner do well cads,
    Drink up! me 'arties, yo ho.
    Aye but we're loved by our mommies and dads, 
    Drink up! me 'arties, yo ho.

A couple of little things were missing...the crab at the skeletons' beach and the hairy footed pirate. Still, the ride was fun. I know that they are going to change it so that the pirates are chasing women carrying food instead of just chasing women (Dori Hoffman said it best: "They're changing it from lust to gluttony.") Even though the imagineers say that it will be obvious that the Pirates are persuing the food, we all *know* what the pirates are really chasing after. Fortunately, it would be much harder for them to change the "Buy a Wench for a Bride" scene, so it will remain unaltered.

Hidden Treasure and Characters Galore

After that we went to the Haunted Mansion, and then worked our way back across the park because Savannah and Nini wanted to ride Space Mountain. When we passed by the Indiana Jones ride, we saw that the line was short, and since Amanda, Savannah and Nini had not ridden it before, we decided to ride it. In the queue area, Tim mentioned that every attraction that replaces something in the park has some part of that old attraction included as a commemoration. Indy didn't replace an attraction, but it did take up part of the "Eeyore" section of the parking lot. A cast member saved one of the displaced Eeyore signs and hid it up in a catwalk over the queue area for Indy. Tim said we needed a flashlight to see it. Once again, I had my backpack, so I pulled out the flashlight, and started searching the catwalk. We found it (it's not easy to spot, even with a flashlight). Tim asked "You carry a flashlight?" (I didn't think that it would come in handy twice.)

By the time we exited Indy, it was still raining. Cindy, her friend and the two girls decided to get ponchos to protect themselves. Earlier we had gone through the list of why it was raining...Tim brought an unmbrella, nobody had washed their cars, so it must have been my fault--I left my poncho at home even though I had originally packed it. When I saw the forecast for southern California was for sunshine, I unpacked my poncho. Sorry everyone. I didn't buy a poncho, since I didn't mind getting wet.

After our shopping stop, and then the ride of Space Mountain, we were hungry, so we had breakfast at the Plaza Inn. The food was a typical breakfast (I had French Toast, a fruit cup, sausage, orange juice and coffee), but the atmosphere was special for the kids. When we walked in, we saw The White Rabbit (who Tim asked "What time is it?"), The Beast, Tweedledum and Tweedledee. The kids got all of their autographs. During our meal, we saw Cinderella, Aurora (Sleeping Beauty), Alice, and the Queen of Hearts. The kids were delighted. After our meal, I made the next suggestion... "Lets go to London!".

The line for Peter Pab was short, and soon we were flying over London and off to Neverland. Writing about Peter Pan has made me think of a trivia question:

        Most rides at Disneyland go clockwise...
	which rides at Disneyland go counter-clockwise?

After Peter Pan, we rode Star Tours, and then It's a Small World. As we were riding It's a Small World, we sang along. Just so you too can have it ringing through your head:

    It's a world of laughter, a world of tears.
    It's a world of hopes.  It's a world of fears.
    There's so much that we share, 
    That it's time we're aware,
    It's a small world after all.

    CHORUS:  It's a small world after all,
             It's a small world after all,
             It's a small world after all,
             It's a small, small world.

    There is just one moon and one golden sun,
    And a smile means friendship to everyone.
    Though the mountains divide
    and the oceans are wide,
    It's a small world after all.
No, we did not know it well enough to sing it in other languages.

By this time, it had stopped raining and the sun had come out. Cindy and I later joked about that--"You can turn off the water now, we've sold enough ponchos." or "You can change the force shielded dome to sunlight". The kids wanted to go on to Toontown, so we went along. It was fun to see them react when more characters showed up--Donald, Daisy, Pluto, Goofy, and then Minnie. In fact over the course of the day, Cindy and I both saw more characters than any other time we've been to the park. We don't know if it was because we weren't rushing to any places in particular, or because there were fewer people, but we ended up seeing almost every major character during the day.

Amanda and the kids couldn't stay in the park all day, so we said good-bye, and left them in Toon Town. We walked back to Frontierland to ride Big Thunder Mountain--it was closed (well, Chuq Von Rospach repeatedly said that it's the most tempermental ride in the park). We then went up to the Disney Gallery, which sits atop Pirates of the Caribbean. The Gallery is one of my two favorite spots in the park (the other is Snow White's Grotto). The Gallery contains rooms with various pieces of Disney art and also has a little courtyard in its center.

One reason for going to the Gallery was so Cindy could see what was going to replace one of her favorite rides--the Rocket Jets. One of the Gallery's rooms is devoted to Euro Disneyland Paris and contains a model of The Orbitron, which will replace the Rocket Jets. Cindy was glad to see that the Rocket Jets are going to be replaced with a similar ride.

Other rooms in the Gallery are devoted to the Indiana Jones ride and Disney Animation. The animation room had sericels of Winnie the Pooh on one wall, and signed cells and character sheets from the classic animators. Oh, if only I had a few thousand dollars to spend.

They moved the snakes

Next we went to the Jungle Cruise. The Jungle Cruise queue area goes behind a small shop that sells various Adventureland items. When we rode it in October, Tim was able to grab a rubber snake from the shop and terrorize Cindy with it (he put it back). This time we noticed that the snake barrels were moved out of hands' reach from the queue. The cruise itself was nothing special, though there was one good impromptu joke--when we passed by the crocodiles, there was a duck sleeping on one of them. Our skipper said "The crocodile is a terrifyingly ferocious animal, and also provides a comfortable place to sleep."

After that, it was time to say goodbye to Tim, who had another event to attend that evening. Tim was disappointed he didn't get to ride the rocket jets (which were still down because water collected inside the jets) or see the Christmas Parade.

Cast Members aren't happy either

This just left Cindy and myself. I wanted to get some pictures of the Pirates chasing the women, but I had slow film in my camera. When I purchased some fast film, I told the cast member at the photo shop that I wanted pictures of Pirates. He understood exactly what I meant, and expressed his disappointment that the ride was being altered. After Cindy did some shopping of her own, we went back to Fantasyland (via the Sleeping Beauty castle walkthrough) to ride on Alice's Adventures In Wonderland; The line was too long for our tastes, but we also saw a prime viewing spot for the Christmas parade which was going to pass by. We took it. The cast member who was guarding the rope for the viewing area noticed a button I was wearing; it commemorated both the 40th anniversary of Disneyland, and the 5th anniversary of the USENET newsgroup rec.arts.disney (which has since been broken up into several groups). We started talking about some of the changes to the park, and she also agreed that it was sad that Pirates was changing.

Magical Parade Moments

During the parade, Cindy waved to each of the float drivers (She didn't know if they could see her, but she waved anyway) and I waved to the characters. One of those moments of Disney magic occured when Goofy came by and shook hands with people along the route; A little kid who was on someone's shoulders was exstatic to see Goofy, but Goofy didn't notice. Everyone in our area called Goofy back, and then Goofy saw the kid and shook his hand. The child grinned.

Later on, the float with the Disney princesses came by. This in itself wasn't magical, but chasing after the float were Cinderella's step-sisters and step-mother. They were looking for a prince, and asked onlookers "Are you a prince?". When someone near us said "I am.", they rushed over with excited looks, paused, looked at him, turned to each other, shook their heads and said "aww, you're not a prince. let's go girls", and then continued their search.

After the parade, we took a ride to Wonderland, watched Captain EO for the last time (it's going to be replaced with "Honey, I Shrunk the Audience") and then went back to Pirates of the Caribbean. There were two annoying and obnoxious teenage boys behind us in the line for Pirates. Their "conversation" was strongly peppered with expletives that rhyme with "witch" (about every other word) and "truck" (about every third word). Cindy comments "Now, I can deal with some swearing, but this was ridiculous. Swearing like sailors could be argued as fitting in with the theme of the ride, but it was still inappropriate."--so, when we rached the loading area, Cindy told the cast member about the two boys, and they were loaded onto their own boat. Both of us decided, though, that even though they were put in the middle of a boat all by themselves, they weren't going to learn anything."

As result of Cindy's thoughtfulness, we were rewarded with the front seat of the next boat. This gave me a great spot to take pictures from...hopefully they will turn out.

So where do we want to eat?

By this time, we were hungry again. Cindy suggested the Hungry Bear restaurant, which has an dining area right on the edge of the Rivers of America. Unfortunately, the Hungry Bear was closed. We then saw a long line, and being Cal alumni, just had to see what it was for. In this case, it was for people who wanted to see characters from Winnie the Pooh. Our slight detour allowed a cast member to spot Cindy's Cowboys sweatshirt. He said "I'm sorry to tell you this, but the Cowboys lost today." It turned out he wasn't that sorry; in fact, he was quite happy that the Cowboys lost. We asked about the other game, but he wasn't sure.

This reminded me of something that happened back when Andy and I went to Orlando for the Citrus Bowl back in 1991:

   On our first day, we had dinner at the Hoop-de-do Revue 
   (which is a western themed restaurant with floor show).
   I was wearing my "Go Bears!" button that day.  Our waitress
   noticed the button and said "I'm sorry, but the Bears lost 
   today."  We explained that we were not fans of the Chicago
   Bears; We were here to root for the California Golden Bears,
   who were playing Clemson in the Citrus Bowl.  She understood,
   and when she gave us our bill, she signed it and added
   "Thanks!  Hope your team wins!".

But back to the present

We looked for other places to eat. None of the places in Orleans Square piqued our interest. We then tried the Hunchback of Notre Dame Festival of Foods (which used to be the Big Thunder Mountain Barbeque)--closed. Eventually, we went back to the Plaza Inn (where we had breakfast) and liked the choices.

Another Disney Magic moment

Dinner itself--Rotiseree chicken, mashed potatoes, spinach, and a roll--wasn't special, but while we were dining, two characters (both princesses) came into the restaurant. They both were having fun pleasing the kids in the restaurant. Then, the blonde turned and saw my Fantasmic sweatshirt, covered her face in fright. The brunette turned to her and asked "Cinderella, what's wrong." "Oooh, the dragon on that man's sweatshirt is soooo frightening." It was a priceless moment. When they want on to the next table, I asked the brunette which character she was, since her dress was covered with a blue cloak. She said "I'm Belle; I'm wearing the same outfit I wore when I rode to the Beast's castle on my horse Phillipe." Ah yes. It was the first time that either Cindy or I had seen Belle wearing something other than the gold ballroom gown.

Last Time for the Rocket Jets

After dinner, it was dark enough to fully enjoy the Rocket Jets. While in line, we saw three castmembers in front of us (we could tell, because they were in costume). Then, two more cast members got in line after us. This time we recognized one of them to be the same cast member we had talked to alongside the parade (and she recognized us). She told us that the cast members were encouraged to actually ride the Rocket Jets in costume. I'm glad they had that oportunity. I also asked if they had the same privilege for Pirates. She said that they couldn't ride Pirates during their break. I told her that I hoped the cast members would get another chance to ride it after the park had closed.

Normally when you ride the Rocket Jets, you're supposed to ride two or three per rockets. Somehow Cindy and I managed to get to ride by ourselves. Each rocket jet is too long to sit back in and steer with your hands; instead, you have to use your feet. This was a lot of fun, though Cindy had a little easier time of it than I did. Cindy happens to be just the right height to fit her foot into the pitch control, while I had to move mine behind or in front of the control bar to make the jet go up and down. The three cast members who were in front of us also did the same.

Trolling for Riders?

After the rocket jets, we did some more wandering. When we rode Storybookland, which had a short line, we got to fully notice all of the changes that had been made. Though one part seemed a bit wimpy--at one point you pass by a willow tree, which our guide said was the "Kissing Tree" from The Little Mermaid. She said that if you looked carefully, you could see Sebastian in the tree singing. She said "It really is the highlight of the ride; If you missed it, you can try again next time, since the line is short." Cindy commented that she had never heard a cast member troll for riders before (and neither had I).

One last Yo Ho

Next came Big Thunder Mountain. When we boarded the train, we said "bye" to the loader. When we came back, he said "Hi!". I always like it when a cast member acknowleges you. We rode pirates one last time, and this time I decided to take some flash pictures; It turns out quite a few other people had the same idea, though the line was still short.

Cindy's two favorite repeated Jungle Cruise jokes

The first time I ever rode the jungle cruise at night was when Andy and I came to the park on a two-day passport. We had a great tour guide who factored in the night-time into his jokes. For example, when we reached the hippo pool, he said "Uh oh, we're approaching a pool of dangerous hippos. But that's not a problem; it's the ones who are in the trees that you have to really worry about." He then fired a couple of shots into the trees, shined a spotlight into the trees, moved it from the trees to the water while making a bomb-dropping whistling noise, and then went "Sploosh!". It had the entire boat in stitches. Since that time, I've gone on the cruise at night whenever possible.

This time the line was very short (though Cindy hid from the snakes again). While were dockside, it looked like we were going to to get the same skipper we had earlier that day, so we started to let people pass us by. Then a new skipper hopped into the boat, so we stopped letting people pass. The new skipper started to load his gun and found that he didn't have any shells. He threw the boat into reverse to get new shells. As the boat backed away, Cindy waved and shouted "Bye! Bye! Have fun stormin' the castle!" Someone else in line said "Do you think they have a chance?" I replied, "It'd take a miracle."

Eventually the skipper brought the boat back. Cindy was happy because he included two of her favorite jokes...the "backside of water" joke and the following: "When you exit the boat, please make sure you take your children with you. Any children left in the boat will be taken to It's a Small World, have their feet super-glued to the floor and be forced to sing that song over and over again." Cindy remembers when they used "bolted" instead of "super-glued" while I remember "nailed".

Imagination

After brief stops at the Disneyana shop to pick up an item for Cindy's brother, and then the Haunted Mansion, we went to see Fantasmic. At first it looked like we were going to be stuck in the back, but then we worked our way towards the dock where the Tom Sawyer rafts usually are. A cast member saw my Fantasmic sweatshirt and said "Hey! Where'd you get that." I explained that I bought back during Fantasmic's first season. He said that he wished the park still sold them (I was surprised that they stopped). After he left, we saw that there was space along the water next to the dock. It was a nice spot.

This performance of Fantasmic was a little different than others. The engines of the Columbia had failed, so they had to push it with a barge; this forced a few of things:


They also had a new dragon...which didn't look as impressive as the ones we had in years past (Cindy described it as a "crape paper" dragon). Still, the show was great, and even though we were at the water's edge, we did not get wet.

After the show ended, we made our way back to the parking lot. When we walked past Pirates of the Caribbean, I sniffled in sadness that it was no longer going to be the same. We saw that the boats were still running, so maybe they did give cast members one last chance to ride it...at least I hope they did.

The Worst Ride

Normally, the worst ride is the ride home. For me, this was delayed. The ride back to Cindy's place was fine...it helped that she played a tape of Beauty and the Beast. Nope, for me, the worst ride was the ride to LAX the next morning. It meant the end of an enjoyable weekend.

Thank You:


Before I finish, here are some frightening (to me, at least) statistics...

Between 1965 and 1975, I had spent 1 day at Disneyland.
Between 1975 and 1985, I had spent 0 days at Disneyland.
                       (though I did spend a day at Knott's)
Between 1985 and 1995, I had spent 5 days at Disneyland.
                       (and 4 days at Disneyworld).
Since 1995, specifically, since Wednesday, August 28, 1996,
    I have been to Disneyland on 5 different days (though 3
    were consecutive).  If I had known that I was going to
    visit Disneyland this often, I'd have bought an annual
    pass before my WorldCon trip last Summer.
Oops, one more addendum. David Letterman had his own comments on the changes to Pirates...he came up with the Top 10 Other Disney World Attractions Being Closed for Renovations. (Yes, he said Disney World.)
Copyright 1997 Sean "Yoda" Rouse
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